.....

This is the worst week of my life. It's hell. Hell's everywhere. In the house, school, even the service is hell. In short, I'm having such sa hellish life. AND I DON'T LIKE IT. I don't know why things are happening. It's de ja vu. It's like going through what I went through the past year. And I don't know what to do.

It's like walking in the dark, without light, hoping that every turn I make is right. But every turn I've made is wrong and I'm still struggling to find the right way. It's hard. I don't even have anyone to guide me or even just someone go with me through this dark path. I don't know. Yes, it's so ironic. I have so many people around me but I just feel that I'm by myself this time. It's weird. I feel that I haven't had any deep relationship with anyone until now. Four years have passed and still...I feel that no one really knows who I am. I don't know. It's like no one really bothers to know me more than how they see me.

WTF?! I'm being such a drama queen. But yeah, maybe it's because of all the stress. I HATE IT. And I thought, for the first time in four years, that I have started establishing something deep with someone. No, with people. I was just starting to open up and get them to know me more. I was hoping that I'd find soemthing more. Oh well. I don't really know what to do right now.

I want these feelings to go away. I just cried for like an hour awhile ago, something I don't normally do. Especially in school. But what the heck, I did cry. For some reason, when I closed my eyes, tears started to fill up my eye. Oh, and I realized I could let tears fall from my eye one at a time. Without squinting ha! I can be an actress. Who said only Claudine Baretto could do that?! haha

Yes, I know I've been a little too sensitive lately and I'm so sorry for those people whom I got hurt, raised my voice to and you-know-what. I've never been like this before. I hope I get over this. SOON.

UPCAT

I will be taking it this Saturday. Please, please pray for me. I really want to pass UP. I'd want to choose between DLSU and UP. Oh yeah, who's going to take their test at 12.30 pm, in the CVM-IAS Communal Building aside from Mina and Joy?