..damn it..

and again, im lost.im confused.im sad.im pressured.lahat na ng emotions.it feels so heavy inside.so heavy.ive been crying since last night.alam mo ung feeling na ang hirap huminga?.ung masakit?.thats what i feel now.gusto kong iiyak lahat lahat.pero now, i have a bigger responsibilty.my decision would be the make or brake.it would either be good or bad.and I am the one who will decide.its either i would go to the states and NEVER come back.Read: Live there.or still live here, with my mom but it would really be hard.=/.the truth is, i really dont want to live there.but, they (my mom's side) wouldnt also want to leave us here with our dad.and i personally, would also go with my mom.but should i stay there for good or come back here?!.i dont know.would i be selfish?!.can i sacrifice that much for our future?!.i WANT to.but i dont know if i can do it.i would want to stay here in the philippines but, is it still right?!.would it be the best for us?!.these questions and a lot more are running through my mind.but whatever happens, i want GOD to help me.i want him to show me what would be best for us.